Going head to head.
Last night, Barstool Sports founder and CEO Dave Portnoy dropped a Zach Bryan diss track that set the internet on fire.
Of course if you’re not familiar with the whole story that sentence would probably make you wonder what the hell is going on, so let’s back up for a minute.
The country superstar and his girlfriend, Barstool Sports personality Brianna Chickenfry (whose real name is Brianna LaPaglia), announced a couple of weeks ago that they had broken up. And by that I mean Zach announced it on his Instagram story, an announcement that caught Brianna by surprise.
While she hasn’t spoken much about the breakup yet, her boss was quick to make his feelings on Zach Bryan known – and let’s just say he’s not a fan:
“I was never a liker. How do you like that? I was never a liker…
I think he’s a fraud. Every time I met him I was not comfortable with him. Certain guys where you’re like, ‘Ok I kinda like this guy, he’s a gives good vibes guy.’ This guy never gave that vibe to me.”
He also revealed that Zach had previously banned him from a concert over a joke the notoriously outspoken Portnoy had made six months earlier:
“Apparently, Zach went back, like, how many months was it? It had to be six months… we at one time on BFFs had a discussion where Bri just got a new boyfriend, and we’re like, ‘Whoa, that’s like your third boyfriend in barely a couple months.’
I’m like, ‘You’re a revolving door of boyfriends lately. He saw that, flipped… six months prior, and banned us from going to the concert. Bri was like, ‘It’s the first, biggest fight we’ve been in.’ I’m like this is what we do, like we joke, like what are you mad about?”
So yeah, clearly not a Zach Bryan guy (although he did admit that he was starting to like Zach’s music).
But anyway, yesterday Portnoy and Josh Richards, who both co-host the BFFs podcast alongside Brianna, decided to support their friend and co-host by dropping an absolutely insane diss track called “Smallest Man.”
The duo pulled no punches in calling out Zach for his alleged infidelity – and much more:
“If Zach is awake I know that he’s been drinkin’
Head looks like a Lego, hair like Homer Simpson
This is for the women that you cheated and neglected
Music is infectious, your penis is infected
You gave out STDs and then you start to spiral
Zach, that’s not what we mean by going viral”
And there was also a portion at the end of the song where they parodied Zach’s song “28.”
“How lucky is Bri to be free of ZB and his STDs”
But that outro apparently got them in some hot water with Zach’s record label, Warner Music Group, which filed copyright claims and had the song removed from YouTube and streaming services.
Well Portnoy wasn’t going to give up, and just returned with an update that the song – minus the outro – was now back up on YouTube, and would be dropping on streaming services tonight at midnight.
And guess who else has music dropping tonight? Yep, Zach Bryan.
Now, I’m sure Portnoy didn’t plan it this way, but his diss track of Zach is now going to be going head to head on streaming services with new music from Zach Bryan himself.
If you want to vote with your streams, you’ll have your chance to take sides when these songs drop tonight.
@stoolpresidenteThey can’t keep us down. Smallest Man video is back up, music rereleasing at midnight ET tonight. Link in b i o