Oh, boy.
Sharp Entertainment scraped the bottom of the barrel when it cast 90 Day Fiancé: Happily Ever After? Season 9, amirite?
There’s never a dull moment in this franchise, mostly because the cast is so chaotic, and the drama barely gives you time to breathe.
Let’s dive into the madness of 90 Day Fiancé: Happily Ever After? Season 9 Episode 1 — because it was a lot.
I’ll admit one thing right off the bat: I was curious about Elizabeth and Andrei, mainly because they’ve been MIA for years. At one point, they were in every spinoff TLC could squeeze them into, but viewers got tired of the constant drama between them and Elizabeth’s family.
Her siblings were practically auditioning for their own show with all that pot-stirring, and thankfully, TLC didn’t bite. Elizabeth and Andrei have since cut ties with the family, which is progress… but it also seemed to put Andrei on a power trip.
He’s always been hot-headed and prone to controlling situations that don’t involve him, but his antics at Loren and Alexei’s party were both inappropriate and tone-deaf.
90 Day Fiancé: Happily Ever After? Season 9 Showcases an Unhinged Andrei
Elizabeth has always made it clear she wants to stay in the U.S., so it was a legitimate surprise to hear her even entertaining a move to Moldova. It felt like something she agreed to stay on the show, not something she actually believed in.
As the episode progressed, it became clear they’re not on the same page, no matter how much they want us to think otherwise.
My best guess? They were desperate for a storyline to get back in the 90 Day Fiancé mix. The whole thing reeks of manufactured drama, and unless it takes a more grounded turn that doesn’t involve Andrei steamrolling every woman in the room, I’m out.
Andrei should have thought about the impact of his words at that party. He wasn’t asking Elizabeth to move — he was telling her she was moving. Big difference. Elizabeth enjoys her lifestyle in Florida and has established roots there. Why uproot everything just to stroke Andrei’s ego?
The math isn’t mathing, and her passive behavior during the dinner party didn’t help. She had multiple chances to speak up, but instead, Loren had to step in and shut Andrei down.
Props to Noga, though — she was the MVP of the night. Meeting Andrei for the first time and still having the guts to call him out for how he spoke to women? Iconic. She said what so many viewers have been thinking for years.
If Andrei doesn’t go on a sincere apology tour soon, this might be the end of the road for him on the franchise.
Now, let’s talk about the group dynamic. I’m not sure how I feel about the show following Andrei, Elizabeth, Loren, Alexei, Yara, and Jovi as a collective.
Are Producers Manipulating Fans?
They all live near each other, which means the drama will be condensed into one party after another. The trailer basically confirms this, and so do the screaming matches.
Speaking of couples who need to take a hike, Gino and Jasmine are somehow still here. Their open relationship storyline is messy, contrived, and exhausting.
Since 90 Day Fiancé: Before the 90 Days Season 5, these two haven’t had a genuine moment of connection. The red flags have been there from the jump, and yet here we are — years later — watching them circle the same drain.
Even when they’re apart and dating other people, Jasmine is still clinging to the fantasy that they’ll make it work. Gino’s clearly moved on, and Jasmine’s delusion is no longer compelling TV.
If it were up to me, they’d be benched from the franchise until they actually get their act together.
That airport tease from the 90 Day Fiancé: Happily Ever After Season 9 trailer? So predictable. TLC baited us with slick editing to make us think they were meeting up, when in reality, it was their new love interests.
This is what I mean when I say the show is chasing controversy instead of telling real relationship stories. Gino and Jasmine are done, and trying to build drama around new love triangles isn’t working.
Then there’s Jasmine’s new guy, Matt, also known as her baby daddy. He seems chill, but the chemistry? Nonexistent. He’s taking their situationship very casually, which is fine — until she hits him with the pregnancy bombshell. That’s going to test him real quick.
Sure, the storyline could get juicy, but if TLC turns it into a petty catfight between Gino’s new woman and Jasmine, I’m out.
Kara and Guillermo, on the other hand, seem like the only couple actually here for the right reasons. They had their issues back in 90 Day Fiancé Season 9, but they came out stronger, at least for a while.
Now? Not so much.
Kara and Guillermo’s Storyline is Heartbreaking
It’s written all over their faces — especially Guillermo’s. That big smile from their early days? Gone. He looks completely checked out. Kara knows their marriage is in trouble, and you can feel the distance between them in every scene.
They have very different personalities, and I have always wondered whether that would ultimately benefit or harm them. There’s a real story here, and I hope TLC lets it play out honestly, whether they reconcile or decide to go their separate ways.
And finally… sigh. Darcey and Georgi.
Why is TLC still doing this?
Darcey & Stacey tanked because there just wasn’t enough material to sustain it, and now they’re back in the mothership franchise — but nothing has changed.
I heard Darcey’s voice before I saw her, and I genuinely thought I’d stumbled into that South Park “It’s a Jersey Thing” episode. The shrieking was unreal.
As for her storyline? Another nothingburger. She claims she hasn’t formed a relationship with Georgi’s family after all these years, which says it all. It’s just another round of drama for the sake of staying relevant.
If this premiere is any indication, Season 9 is more about recycled drama and recycled faces than real emotional journeys. And yet, here we are — still watching, still tweeting, still yelling at our TVs.
It’s a mess. But it’s our mess.
What are your thoughts on the premiere, 90 Day Fiancé Fanatics? Let’s stick it to those producers in the comments!
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