“The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, in hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.” – “The Night Before Christmas,” a.k.a. “A Visit From St. Nicholas.”
Growing up back east, Marsha DiFatta, nee Bolinsky, and her three siblings could always count on one present at the bottom of their stockings hanging from the fireplace mantel when they woke up Christmas morning.
An orange.
It was a symbol of the gold St. Nicholas dropped down the chimney of an old man who had lost all his money, and feared his three daughters would never get married because he had no dowry for them.
There was a time and still is in some countries where the father of the bride was obligated to lay out some serious cash, gold, property or other items of value to the groom’s father for the privilege of marrying into his family.
I’m sure love was involved in there somewhere, but there were no “I do’s” without some financial arrangement. Not anymore. Sometime in the last couple of centuries the bride’s father wised up, and hired an attorney, who filed a cease and desist order, and told the groom’s father, “We’ll pick up the tab for the wedding, but that’s it.”
The gold St. Nicholas dropped down the chimney miraculously wound up in the washed stockings the old man’s daughters had hung up to dry above the fireplace, and, Merry Christmas, now his daughters could get married.
Word of St. Nick’s incredible 3-pointer down the chimney soon spread, and kids around the world began pestering their parents to hang their stockings by the chimney with care, in hopes St. Nicholas soon would be there.
They wanted some of that gold. They got oranges, instead, which brings me back to Marsha DiFatta.
“In Pennsylvania, where I grew up, oranges were a treat, and costly,” she says. “It really meant something to get that orange. We loved them. Then, we moved to California, and I have a backyard full of oranges. They’re all over the place.”
She was giving them away by the dozens last week when another tradition resumed in the DiFatta’s Chatsworth home after taking a year off because of COVID.
Last Saturday, Marsha’s husband, Joe, a sweetheart of a guy, had 31 members of his family over for a big Italian dinner, where all the kids exchanged presents, and their parents toasted each other a Merry Christmas.
The next day, Sunday, Marsha had 27 members of her Polish and Irish family over.
The requirements at these gatherings for both sides of the family: Everyone had to wear a mask — and be fully vaccinated, including their booster shot.
It’s a requirement being asked in a lot of families right now. Do we invite the unvaccinated over or Zoom with them? COVID ruined Christmas last year, are we going to let it ruin Christmas again for everyone in the family?
Not the DiFattas.
“I had about 20 ladies in my family in the kitchen with me making Kolache bread, a Hungarian nut bread my Slavic grandmother always baked at Christmas. We made 200 loaves,” Marsha says.
“On Christmas day, we’ll have our two children, four grandchildren, five great grandchildren, a son-in-law, grandson-in-law and granddaughter-in- law with us.
“From Slavic, Irish and Italian, our family has grown to be part Mexican, German, Japanese and Jewish. Who knows what comes next, but all are welcome.”
The DiFattas will be celebrating 62 years of marriage next March, and Marsha’s father didn’t have to pay a dime of dowry to marry into Joe’s family.
“We met in 10th grade at San Fernando High, and I married him in 11th grade,” Marsha says. “We’ve been blessed. We’re second generation Americans, and had that old world upbringing. Family comes first.”
But, you’d better be wearing a mask and vaccinated because you can’t make Kolache bread or eat one of the DiFatta’s juicy oranges in a Zoom call.
Merry Christmas, and mind the words of Sgt. Phil Esterhaus at morning roll call in “Hill Street Blues.”
Let’s be careful out there.
Dennis McCarthy’s column appears on Sunday. He can be reached at dmccarthynews@gmail.com.